Q:My girlfriend asked me what her attractiveness rating is, and I said 7. Now she is really upset. What did I do wrong?

我的女朋友让我为他的外貌打分，我给他打了7分。现在他非常沮丧，我做错了什么地方？

A：
I think that asking this question in the first place reflects poorly on your girlfriend - she's obviously insecure about her looks and about your feelings for her. Also, it's a trick question: If you answer "10", she'll be mad at you because you lied (if she was a 10, she'd be the most attractive woman in the world, a globally acclaimed super model). If you answer anything less than 10, she'll be mad that you don't find her attractive enough (otherwise you'd say "10").

我认为你的女朋友问这个问题首先反应了她的弱项-她显然对她的外貌没有安全感以及关注你对她的感受。接下来，这是一个圈套：如果你回答10分，她会非常生气，因为你说谎（假如她的外貌真实10分，她将是世界上最有美丽的女人，一个万人迷）如果你回答少于10分，她也会生气你没有发现她真正的魅力所在（否则你会回答10分）。。

Having said that, your mistake is that you answered her question with a concrete rating. Besides falling into the trap stated above, the fact that you can rate your girlfriend's attractiveness at all means that you compare it to that of other women, and not always favorably (if she's 7 on your scale of 1 - 10, that means you know women who rate 8, or 9, or 10). She's probably mad about that also - that she's not unique to you, she's just one of many women you rate as a potential romantic/sexual partner.

回答这个问题，你的错误在于你用实际的评分回答了她的问题，同时落入了这个圈套当中。事实上当你给你的女朋友的外貌标上分数的时候已经意味着你在拿她和其他女人作对比（如果在你的心目当中，她是7分，那么肯定在你心目当中有比他高的）她会因此生气，因为她不是你的独一无二，因为她在你心目当中只是普通女人中的一位玩物/炮友。

If my wife asked me such a question, I'd tell her that she doesn't have an "attractiveness rating" - she is too unique for ratings. I'd also add that she's the only one I love, and the only one I want to be with. Hopefully, that would get me out of the trap :)

如果我老婆问我相似的问题，我会回答说没有哪一个分数能够标榜你，她在我心目当中是独一无二的。我同时会补充她是我的唯一，也是唯一的一位我想共度此生的女人。顺利的话，这个答案能够帮我走出这个圈套：）

微信公众号：PM范儿