学习图表范文
C7P53P164; C9P53P164
任务三:雅思写作指导-一篇好的task 1的范文
下面我以剑9P53P164的范文为例,给大家分析一下什么是一篇好的文章
图表见书上,官方范文如下
The chart shows the time spent by UK residents on different types of telephone calls between 1995 and 2002.
Local fixed line calls were the highest throughout the period, rising from 72 billion minutes in 1995 to just under 90 billion in 1998. After peaking at 90 billion the following year, these calls had fallen back to the 1995 figure by 2002.
National and international fixed line calls grew steadily from 38 billion to 61 billion at the end of the period in question, though the growth slowed over the last two years.
There was a dramatic increase in mobile calls from 2 billion to 46 billion minutes. This rise was particularly noticeable between 1999 and 2002, during which time the use of mobile phones tripled.
To sum up, although local fixed line calls were still the most popular in 2002, the gap between the three categories had narrowed considerably over the second half of the period in question.
评分标准一:Task achievement (找趋势和比较)
local-fixed lines: 始终最大,先上升,到一个peak;然后下降回到跟原来一样大
National and Internationl-fixed line: 稳定的上升,但是上升在最后两年有放缓(最后放缓这里是可以不写的,比较细节)
Mobiles: 三个变化中最显著的(dramatic); 后期比前期涨的快。(始终最小没有写)
这一个评分标准来看,文章近乎完美!
评分标准二:Coherence and Cohesion (分段和段落内部的连接)
1.分段:
开头一段
中间三个对象各自一段(后两个对象也可以写成一段的)
结尾一段
2.段落内部的连接和过渡(重点关注时间连接词)
between 1995 and 2002
throughout the period
the following year
by 2002
at the end of the period in question
over the last two years
over the second half of the period in question
总结:分段合理,时间连接词变化丰富
评分标准三:Lexical resources (词汇)
同义词替换: rise; peak at; grow; fall; slow; triple
词性转化(名词):growth; increase; rise
修饰词汇: steadily; dramatic; noticeably; considerably
评分标准四:GRA (语法)
第一段: spent---过去分词
第二段: rising; after peaking at----现在分词
第三段: though-----让步状语从句
第四段: during which time ------时间从句; there be 句型
第五段: although----- 让步从句