Week 1
写在最前面，通过一个星期的阅读，主要是发现自身的问题，意识到现在存在的不足。第一步便是“发现”。很多时候，我们没有意识到自己的问题，然后继续以错误的方式，不合适的方法，不良好的心态去学习工作，去面对生活，到头来发现效果差强人意，付出的努力却没有得到预想的回报。所以好好审视自己，发现不足，慢慢改进吧。
Part 1 字词精选
1.After a few weeks, I fizzle.
Fizzle:(1) to gradually end, often in a disappointing or weak way 逐渐终止，有始无终
e.g. I always make a promise for losing weight, but I fizzle after persistence on a few days.
(2) when sth, especially sth that is burning, fizzles, it makes a sound like a long 's' (火等)发出嘶嘶声
e.g. The fire fizzled in the furnace.
2. I feel pressured and hassled all day.
Hassle: to annoy sb or cause them trouble, especially by asking them to do sth many times (不断)烦扰,麻烦
e.g. The supervisor requires us to revise our paper format again and again, I really feel hassled.
3. I’m eating my heart out.
Eat one’s heart out: (1)to grieve bitterly (2) to be jealous
我认为文章的中意思是第二种，前面提到看到亲朋好友取得成就或得到认可时，我表面上是微笑的衷心祝贺他们，但其实内心嫉妒不已，很不是滋味。
e.g. I have this kind of feeling that every time when my roommates do something better than me such as gaining the first class scholarship, I smile and congratulate them enthusiastically, but inside, I’m eating my heart out. Fortunately, I am aware it and try to overcome this shortcoming.
4. My marriage has gone flat.
这里的has gone flat用得很形象，把“我”的婚姻形同虚设，毫无意义都表现出来了。这让我想到我最近学到的一个短语，也是描述婚姻关系的，on the rocks,即a relationship or business that is on the rocks is having difficulties and is likely to fail soon。
e.g. His marriage is on the rocks.
5. He was doing poorly academically.
这个句子我认为是写得漂亮地道的，当说一个人学习不好的时候，我可能只会想到He does not do well in study, or he gets a low grade.所以这个句子让我学习到新的更好的用法。
6. Now I was becoming exasperated.
Exasperate: to annoy or irritate sb very much使烦恼；使恼怒；激怒
e.g. Being bombarded with boring questions by somebody, I was exasperated.
7. For my fourth attempt, I resorted to fear and threat.
Resort: V. (1)to make use of sth, especially sth bad, as a means of achieving sth, often because there is no other possible solution 诉诸；求助于；依靠
e.g. I felt obliged to resort to violence to get my money back.
N. (2) a place where a lot of people go on holiday / vacation 旅游胜地；度假胜地:
e.g. In summer, people always go to a seaside resort to take their vacations.
8. It says if you want to have a happy marriage, be the kind of person who generates positive energy and sidesteps negative energy rather than empowering it.
Sidesteps: to avoid answering a question or dealing with a problem回避,规避(问题等)
e.g. As we can see, a great number of stars always neatly sidestep the questions that people want to know.
9. And for a while we can get by with it----at least in public.
Get by (with sth): to manage to live or do a particular thing using the money, knowledge, equipment, etc. that you have
e.g. After learning French for three months, I can get by with it.
10. I've seen unhappy marriages where each spouse wants the other to change, where each is confessing the other's "sins," where each is trying to shape up the other.
Shape up: to improve your behaviour or your work
e.g. My mother warned me to shape up, otherwise I could not go to play games.
11. Nevertheless, the current social paradigm enthrones independence.
Enthrone: if an idea is enthroned, it has an important place in people's life or thoughts. 尊崇;推崇
e.g. Many people enthrone a simple way of life.
12. If necessary, yell at them, intimidate them, insist on your way.
Intimidate: to frighten or threaten someone, usually in order to persuade them to do something that you want them to do 恫吓，恐吓
e.g. When your children are not obedient to your wishes, you should not intimidate them into achieving your goals.
13. It was the serendipitous fruit of a PC investment.
Serendipitous: A serendipitous event is one that is not planned but has a good result. 偶然发生的;有意外收获的
e.g. It was a serendipitous discovery for me to encounter Eric’s public accounts, which I could benefit a lot.
14. The production is phenomenal, costs are down, and profits skyrocket.
Phenomenal: extremely successful or special, especially in a surprising way 非凡的，杰出的
e.g. The performance of Thousand-Hand Kwan-yin has been absolutely phenomenal.
15. If I were intellectually dependent, I would count on you to do my thinking for me, to think through the issue and problems of my life.
Count on: If you count on someone or count upon them, you rely on them to support you or help you. 指望;依靠;依赖
e.g.The only one you can count on is yourself.
16. His basic identity was intact.
Intact：Something that is intact is complete and has not been damaged or changed.完整无缺的;未受损伤的
e.g. In order to keep their reputation intact, the stars cannot do the illegal things such as drug abuse and tax evasion.
17. It isn't a function of whether the weather is conducive to it or not.
Conducive: providing the right conditions for something good to happen or exist 有利的，有助的，有益的
e.g. Reading is conducive to broaden our horizons and understand the world better.
18. He constantly harps at me and finds fault with everything I do.
Harp：to keep talking about sth in a boring or annoying way喋喋不休地谈论；唠叨
e.g. Do not always harp on what you want to do, just take action.
19. These visions are disjointed and out of proportion.
Out of proportion: if a reaction or result is out of all proportion, it is too strong or serious for the thing or situation that has caused it.
e.g. Her head is out of proportion to the size of her body.
这样我想到了Blow things out of proportion夸大事实（这个短语在美国描述媒体时常用）
e.g. The media may be blowing it up out of proportion.
Part 2 中文感悟
From day 1 to day 4
1. I've started a new diet -- for the fifth time this year. I know I'm overweight, and I really want to change. I read all the new information, I set goals, I get myself all psyched up with a positive mental attitude and tell myself I can do it. But I don't. After a few weeks, I fizzle. I just can't seem to keep a promise I make to myself.
看到这一段时，我自己也有切身的体会，我一直想改变现状，想多看几本书，练好口语，多去跑步锻炼身体等等，并且一直都有设定目标与计划。但我总会被这样或那样的事情所牵绊，坚持几天，就开始完成不了任务。我似乎对自己的承诺没有当做一定要履行的事情，没有完成就会懊恼一两天，然后不了了之。
2. 今天看完part one，最大的感触就是，单词大部分都懂，可是就是不能很好的理解文章的内容，不能内化成自己的见解，我能明白文章大部分内容，但不深刻，也不透彻。我想应该多读几遍，好好体会，自己平时习惯阅读太快了，所以思维还跟不上翻书的速度，anyway, I will keep it up.
3.And what we see is highly interrelated to what we are. We can't go very far to change our seeing without simultaneously changing our being, and vice versa.
看到这句的时候，还是挺有感触的，我们所看到，所理解的总与我们是什么样的人息息相关，比如说一个和悲观的人，他会总是对各种各样的事情不满意，抱以消极的看法。只有改变他自身的态度，自身悲观的性格特征，他才能看到不一样的世界。
4.It says if you want to have a happy marriage, be the kind of person who generates positive energy and sidesteps negative energy rather than empowering it. If you want to have a more pleasant, cooperative teenager, be a more understanding, empathic, consistent, loving parent. If you want to have more freedom, more latitude in your job, be a more responsible, a more helpful, a more contributing employee. If you want to be trusted, be trustworthy. If you want the secondary greatness of recognized talent, focus first on primary greatness of character.
这一段真的让自己挺有感触的，如果想要拥有好的婚姻，快乐合作的孩子，更多的自由，被信任等等，那么就从自己开始做起，而不是去期待别人为你做这些，为你而改变。被动等待不如主动改变，从自己开始，改变心态，改变不好的地方，只有这样自己才会获得想要的，拥有更好的。
5.For our purposes, we will define a habit as the intersection of knowledge, skill, and desire. Knowledge is the theoretical paradigm, the what to do and the why. Skill is the how to do. And desire is the motivation, the want to do. In order to make something a habit in our lives, we have to have all three.
我现在终于明白我想养成一些良好的习惯，但总是被这样过那样的借口所搁浅的原因。如坚持跑步，做仰卧起坐，看多一点书，不要把太多的时间消磨在玩手机和看综艺节目上，因为我想拥有健康的完美的体魄，想开阔自己的知识面，在书里去游览没有到过的地方，去体验不同的风俗文化，去发现真实的自己(这就是knowledge)。而且我知道该怎么做，去足球场跑跑，拿起瑜伽垫就可以做，翻起一本书，放下手机，安定下来就可以在书里遨游(这便是skill), 但我缺乏的便是desire, 坚持下去的动力，我只是表面想改变，想养成习惯，当完成不了时总对自己说我没有时间，所以做不了。但实际上是我的内心并没有这样的动力，这样的强烈念想去改变，所以我总是三天打鱼两天晒网。就如平时所说的道理全都懂，但是就不是想去改变，因为没有一个desire去驱使自己改变。所以我要做便是找到自己的desire，才能够坚持下去，才不被任何的理由所打败。
6.Life is, by nature, highly interdependent. To try to achieve maximum effectiveness through independence is like trying to play tennis with a golf club -- the tool is not suited to the reality.
我一直认为做一个独立自主的人就足够了，这样的想法有点类似于各自扫门前雪，不管他人瓦上霜，可是当看到interdependence时，我就知道远远不够了，人与人之间是相互依存的，我们总要与他人交流，合作等等，我们不可能完全独立于人之外，活在自己狭窄的世界里，那样最终也是被这个世界所遗弃的。
7.
我发现自己就是reactive person, 很容易受周围的环境与别人的观点影响。比如说，我不太喜欢下雨天，特别是那种绵绵细雨，一下就是半个月，那种潮湿，那种给生话带来的不便之感，让我不适，影响自己的心情，真的很郁闷。还有我曾经很在乎别人对我的看法，对自己的评价，我可能是打心里想给别人好的印象，对我有好感，所以很轻易因为别人一句话，一个眼神就敏感起来了，而且那样子真的会很累，要不断的去迎合甚至是讨好，才能做到让别人满意。后来有一天也许开窍了，发现无论你怎么做，做的再好，总会有人不喜欢你，那又何苦去热脸贴冷屁股，吃力不讨好呢。所以我有在慢慢改进，但我还达不到proactive person, 因为我还不能主宰自己的“天气” 。一步步来咯，慢慢变得强大，终有一天也会是proactive person.
Part 3 Accumulating good sentences
1.There is no real excellence in all this world which can be separated from right living.
要好好思考自己想要什么样的人生，是否是有意义的，正确的，能否给自己带来无限的兴趣与激情的，唯有这样，才能活出卓越吧。
2.A thousand mile journey begins with the first step.
千里之行，始于足下
每天脚踏实地的做好每一件事情，进步一点点，不好高骛远，空想不干，keep it up
3.That which we obtain too easily, we esteem too lightly.
太轻易得到总是不珍惜。
4.No one can hurt you without your consent.
这句话让我思考颇多，“没有你的允许任何人都不能伤害你"。平时总觉得受到了伤害，那是因为没有意识到自己打心里给了别人伤害自己的权利。
Part 4 Summary
From Inside-Out to Be Proactive
At the very first of the beginning, the author has a list of deep and painful problems that most of us have encountered, which creates our empathy. But how to solve these problems?
The author firstly proposes the power of a paradigm and paradigm shift. Paradigm is the way we “see” the world----not in the terms of our visual sense of sight, but in terms of perceiving, understanding, and interpreting. Everyone has his own paradigm----our ways of viewing and comprehending the society and the world, which distinguishes us from others. But sometimes our paradigms are not always on the right way such as having prejudice against others and falling from grace. Therefore it is necessary for us to shift our paradigms-----to break our ways of thinking and form a new level one and mould a new and right value.
Secondly, the author makes the definition of habits clear before we form a habit so that we are able to know what exactly habits mean and form them effectively. Habits include three aspects: knowledge (the what to do and the why), skill (the how to do) and desire (the motivation). Lack of one of them will not foster a habit. The most important thing is to find out our desires so as to have ample power to insist in. In addition, the author advocates that it is crucial for us achieve the transformations from dependence to independence to interdependence. Consequently, we can have the strong muscle to form helpful habits.
At last, the author proposes the habit 1----be proactive which means that as human beings, we are responsible for our own lives; our behavior is a function of our decisions, not conditions; we can subordinate feelings to values; we have the initiative and the responsibility to make things happen. However it is not easy to be proactive because most of us are reactive persons affected by social environment and feelings. Take myself for example: I don’t like raining days, which easily makes me feel melancholy. This typically shows that reactive people is susceptible to environment. However, in order to become better and better, it is high time for us to be proactive. For one thing, we need to take the initiative, recognizing our responsibility to make things happen and being driven by our value not feelings. For another, focusing on and expanding the circle of influence are essential. We can turn shortcomings into merits rather than complaining and waiting all the time when we focus on the circle of influence. Besides, we are not ““the have’s” but “the be’s” so that we have aspiration to make and keep commitments.
In short, we need to take actions from inside-out and be proactive to change the terrible situation and become the person we want.
