Whether you’re interested in advancing your career, or having a new group of friends to go out with, you need to learn—and perhaps master—the skill of making friends. In this article, I would like to share with you 6 tips that will help you expand your social circles.
无论你是想拓展事业，还是扩张朋友圈，你都需要学习-甚至是掌握-交友技能。在这篇文章中，我想要与大家共享6个扩展社交圈的招数。
1.Connect With Connectors
1.与社交达人来往
A great way to expand your social circle is to connect to someone through whom you’ll meet many other people. Those “connectors” are the types of people who keep friends on Facebook by the thousands, host parties whenever they can, and always seem to be with a large group of people.
有一个拓展社交圈的好办法，那就是与活跃于社交圈的人来往。那些“社交达人们”正是在脸书上有着成千上万粉丝的人群，他们会随心所欲地举办派对，在别人眼中他们也总是成群结队。
Oftentimes, these are very open people and are easier to connect with than you think. They might not have the time to invest in a deep friendship with you, but they love to get to know more interesting people to add to their circle.
通常来说，这些人都非常开放，也比你想象中的还要容易接触。也许他们没有时间和你发展深刻的友谊，但他们却热衷去结识更有趣的朋友，使其融入自己的圈子。
2.Meet New People Constantly
2.不断认识不同的人
A great habit to have is to always be meeting people that you can add to your circles. In reality, not all the people you meet will become your friends and not all your current friends will be around forever. This is why I always say that if you’re not making new friends, you’re actually making fewer.
不断认识新人是拓展交际圈的极佳习惯。现实中，并非所有你遇见的人都会成为朋友，也并非你现在所有的朋友都会永伴左右。这也是我为何总是说如果你没有结识新的朋友，那说明你的朋友在减少。
I recommend that you go to places where it’s easy and appropriate to walk up to anyone and introduce yourself. Ideally, you need to go to places where others are open to meeting new people as well. Examples might be trade shows, opening nights, galas, cultural or charitable events, seminars, and talks.
我建议你到一个能够让你轻松、舒适走上前去并向大家介绍自己的地方。理想情况下，那个地方的人同时也得开怀迎接新朋友。类似的地方就有贸易展览、开幕夜、联欢会、文化或慈善活动、讨论会或茶话会。
3.Establish Yourself As a Giver of Value
3.塑造布施者的价值观
When meeting lots of people, you have to “hook”. Nothing hooks better than having a giver attitude. First, listen really to what they say and imagine if you were them; see the world through their eyes. Second, be willing to share stories, contacts, or quick advice on what people are talking about.
当参加众人聚会时，你得“做钩”。没有什么会比布施者的态度更能钩人了。首先，仔细倾听别人，并换位思考；由他们的视野去观摩世界。然后，诚挚地分享你的故事、故人，或及时给对方所说所讲提出建议。
When you meet new people, there are some psychological principles that determine whether or not they’ll want to meet you again. This works on an unconscious level. One of the most important principles is the giver/takerattitude. If they sense that you only care about yourself, connection isn’t going to happen.
与人初见面，依据的是那套心理学原理，那会直接决定对方是否愿意再见你。这是在潜意识里产生的作用。其中最重要的一条原理就是给予或索取态度。若对方感到你只在乎自己，那么你们不会有下文。
You can portray a giver attitude in two ways. The first is about really listening to what they say, imagining the world through their eyes, and giving them your opinion on their stories and situations. The second way is to prove that you’re ready to share similar stories about what they’re talking about, or introduce them to someone who could help them.
展现给予态度有两种方式。第一种是认真倾听对方，看对方所看的世界，基于对方的故事和情况来给出你的观点。第二种是证明你愿意与之分享类似的故事，或者介绍别人伸出援手。
4.Commit to a Local Community
4.致力于当地社区活动
One of the fastest ways to boost your social life is to get involved in a community that has the type of people that you want as friends. This community should be in your local area and should hold social get-togethers once a month, or more.
促进社交生活最快速的方式之一就是参加社区活动，加入到那个有你想与之交友的社团里。这个社团得在你们当地区域，并且至少每月举行一次或更多的聚会。
What you do is find one that you like, maybe on meetup.com, and offer your help to the people who run it. They’ll most likely accept, even if they don’t need that much help; they’ll just be glad you’re interested. This works great because it makes you meet everyone, and because it establishes you as a giver of value.
而你需要做的就是找一家你中意的社团，这可以在meetup.com网站上找，然后向团里的人提供帮助。即便他们并不怎么需要那份帮助，但绝大多数都会接受；重点是他们乐意看到你心怀兴趣。这招很有用，因为它能让你遇见不同的人，并能树立你作为给予者的价值观。
5.Reach Out to People On a Regular Basis
5.保持定期联系
Staying in touch is vital if you want to keep your social circles alive. You need to follow up with the people you just met, and catch up with existing friends. The challenge here is that we tend to get distracted and forget about it, and regret later on.
如果你想要维持社交圈的人脉，那么保持联系是至关重要的一点。你需要追上新朋友的步伐，还要关注老友的动态。其中的挑战在于我们往往会分心，又因分心而忘记，接着再生悔意。
To solve this problem, you can create a weekly ritual, where you spend only one hour calling, texting, and messaging people. Just mark on your calendar a specific day and time, and do it every week. A great time to do it is Tuesday or Wednesday, as it gives you the opportunity to make plans with people for the weekend.
要解决这个问题，你可以每周关注一次，也就是每周固定花一小时去打电话、发短信或留言。这只需你在日历上标出特定的一天，每周执行一次。最好的日子就是周二或周三，因为能让你和朋友为周末好好计划一翻。
6.Know the Kind of Friends You Want in Advance
6.提前了解自己想要结交怎样的朋友
Before you start investing more time on making friends, do a little planning. Try to figure out what kind of people you want to hang out with. List out a few qualities, character traits, or interests that you like, and don’t hesitate to be a little more ambitious than usual. This is important because it allows your mind to quickly tell if a person you meet could be a great fit for you.
在投资时间去交朋友前，做一个小小的策划。试着弄清楚你想要与什么样的人出去闲逛。不妨列出一些对方的品质、性格特征或与你对味的兴趣爱好，不要犹豫，即使在这点上比平时多点野心又怎样。这个方式之所以重要是因为它能让你的大脑迅速分辨出对方是否与你特别对味。
