This Is America

4th Feb.

We arrived at Chicago on the first day of Feb. The first two days I had diarrhea, grew pimples and always wanted to sleepbcz of the jet lag. Today we went to Chicago. Mostly we just shopped. I ain't ashoppping person so today Chicago trip is just taking pics of Chicago for me.Everywhere we went it got so noisy bcz of us. I feel ashamed. Americans insmall town are friendly and helpful. But in Chicago I just feel people are coldand busy. My roommate has been talked a lot about buying various of make-up butwhen we go into the shop she can't even tell the seller what she wants. Shejust stood there and looked at me. When we asked about the price she just said,let me searched how much is it in China. And we just left. So ashamed to bewith her. She knows nothing more than just spending and when she's in USA shedidn't even know how to buy things.

I felt asleep on the way back toBloomington. So tired and upset this day.

5th

We yellow group had a game this afternoon.

Several groups competed getting shots of particular places with pics that every

member is in. The first group who finishes would get award. We ran fast and

hard and each of us is eager to help. We finished it quickly but didn't know

the result yet. Anyway the result ain't that matter. What matters is we get to

know each other. So after that in the evening we play a card game(狼人杀)and wewere so happy even played it in the school bus on the way back hotel. Petertalked to me a little and I was excited when he mentioned about coming over butI knew he was just saying it.

So tired now. Good night.

6th

Ok actually now its the 7th. You'll knowwhy.

It was the first day Having classes in theschool. 5 of us had class in the morning at 9 and I was nervous. The teacherasked us to find a fake news on the internet and find what it was fake. We werein one big group. I found out the language is not a big problem. What I can'tunderstand is their topic. I think it's the same in other situations, most ofthe time it's not what they say you don't understand, it's their culture you don'tunderstand. That's the biggest problem. Tho you can understand their languagebut you live far away from this country so your topics are just so different.

In the afternoon class, we were separatedinto different groups and each group have two or three Americans. In my groupthere were 3 Chinese and 2 Americans. I noticed a very handsome guy namedGeovani. When he was talking to me i was just looking into his eyes that are sopure and clean. The guy Andrews sitting next to me was gentle and helpful andpatient explaining what the doctor said. They were nice. I normally don't careif guys are handsome or not but Geovani was really impressing.

I had a cup of juice cocktail withoutnoticing it was actually alcohol.... so the result was I was so excited andflushing when had dinner with and friends at the cafeteria while waiting forthe school bus. And when I got the hotel I couldn't even walk and fell one thefloor. And I even called me friend thatI would never called if I was sober. ButI slept so well that night and didn't wake up till the morning and which is whyI didn't write diary.

God, juice cocktail lol

7th

Me and my friends(4) were separated indifferent groups in a class of conflicts of Israeli and Palestiniantoday. There were five girls with me and wehad some time to just chitchat. Students didn't seem much interested in thisclass. Some were even playing with their cell phones which is rare in the classI've taken. And the girls in my group were not that interested in talking so Itried best to tell them interesting things about my travel and things in China.Glad I made them laugh. The doctor was said to be one of the best in thisuniversity but his students didn't seem like his class much.

The whole group had lunch with some of therepresentative staff and the headmaster of this school. It was a traditionalwestern cuisine. First was salad as starter, then main course, then dessert. Itlooked good but didn't taste as good tho.

I've been joined their classes for twodays. I think I'll like American colleges very much. Their classes are active.Their teachers are responsible not like Chinese teachers who just give lecturesand don't interact with students. No wonder they said if you speak AmericanEnglish ppl will think your high educated. Well not every American is highlyeducated but the lines means sth.

8th

I met geonavi and Andries today. I think Ikind of like Andries. He's not tall and he look a bit like Chinese. The mostimportant is he is very gentle. I can't stop thinking about him when havingclass with him. Hehe definitely Geovani is more cute but my eyes were set onAndries. He's my type. I so wanted to talk to him but not know how to start.When he asked me what's up I was like .... I'm just fine and I didn't know whatelse to say. Im so dumb.

I met pen pal again this afternoon. Thegroup and American pen pals were discussing about education in America chinaand India. What was discussed didn't matter. It was just another time for us toknow each other. My pen pal was not a talkative person. Then later my friendtold me they didn't choose to be pen pals in the first place. They are allclassmates. Some even said they wouldn't choose to be pen pals. I am verydisappointed. I bought good wood comb from China as gift to my pen pal. It'snot like she don't like me or don't wanna talk to me. It's I can't help butfeel upset when I learnt that they didn't volunteer. No wonder she's not asenthusiastic as I am.

I guess Americans are kind of keep tothemselves. Most Caucasians probably only like makefriend with Caucasians. I don't know how manyppl here look down on us Chinese visiting group at ISU. But I guess that wouldbe over half of the ppl. Maybe they were just friendly and being polite to helpyou, not bcz they wanna make friends with you.

9th

Today in the morning I had COM 110 alone.It was a public speaking class and I was nervous. But the girl sat beside mewas friendly. She helped me some. It was good experience. You can't always justgo with ur friends or rely on them. U need experience yourself. It'sindependent and it's what I lack most.

In the evening we had round tablediscussion. I talked about religion and social class. Those Americans are niceand friendly and we added on facebook. Actually it was my idea lol I thought itwould be offensive to them but when I brought it up they were very happy withit. I think I had wrong options about them. Tonight I've changed my options. Iwas afraid I couldn't join them even I come to study in future but now I'm notthat afraid. Maybe it's not that hard.

10th

Today is a big day for me.

I washed hair in the morning and put onsuit and make sure I look good and clean today. I saw Andres this afternoon andcouldn't stop looking at him. All the class I was thinking about how I am gonnasay to him after class and how to add him on facebook. And it came to theimportant moment... after class I saw he got out of the classroom so I ranquickly out of the classroom but didn't see him. So I got down stairs andwaited ... then he came. But he walked fast out of the building I almost neededto ran to catch him. He look back at me when I called his name and I flipped.It was cold but I think I blushed hard. Then I asked him if he could recommendsome places to visit like Peter told m that day. He blah blah then I asked himif he could add me on facebook. Then he did !! Hehe! After that he cuddled me.God I was soooooo happy even I jumped!

My hand is now sweating to text him.Actually I don't know what to say but I think if i don't talk to him then thechance will be missing. I flipped lol

11th

Sth I missed to tell on 10th that we wentto the art gallery in the morning. That was my bad day. I tried to take goodpics but I'm fat and all the pics look dumb. While my friends they are slim,well one is not slim but she is skilled to hide her fat. My slim friends dowhatever she wants and all her pics look so cute and good. I regretted so muchthat I didn't lose weight. The priority for me is to lose weight this time Icome back to China.

Oh and Saturday, we had a show on inChinese New Year celebration. It was fun but a bit weird when I see blondeyoung girls wearing qipao on the stage. Hehe. It was fun.

13th

12th and 13th are days for shopping. Ispent 1800rmb in TJmax on 12th and today I spent 5500 on iPhone. I was soexcited when I got my new iPhone....it is brand new. My hands couldn't stopsweating. I was damn excited.

Yesterday in the morning I told dev Iwanted to stop for a while. I told him I am tired. He seemed to get into me.But I'm getting more and more bored. I was thinking about if we could have afuture. But it may be too difficult. He is a bit childish. Not very much mytype. And my things for him were over in a flash. I guess..... well we shallsee.

God I'm crazy about shopping. And myroommate she is bitch. She only talks but neverreally buy anything. Hehe. Finally today she bought a necklace costing99 dollars. That's for walking 4.5 hours! Me buying an iPhone only needs tenminutes.

15th

I met Kelly today and we played card gamestogether. She's really a quiet girl and I think she likes me. She doesn't liketaking pictures she always hides herself when taking pics of the whole group.

In the evening I went to a class ofdifferences of American and Chinese culture and school. A girl and I were inthe class but she just left before the class was about to begin. She was rude.There were only 12 ppl including the professor in that class. They are allgraduate students and they were curious about school things in China. Ianswered their questions and I also had questions for them. They were sofriendly..... at that time I was thinking maybe it's not that bad to studyabroad( I took class in ISU but I felt I couldn't join the class but I didn'tquite understand what they talked:( . But that evening changed my mind and Iwas so happy with them. And the girl who sat beside me gave me a chocolate. Itwas a 3-hour class I was damn hungry but it was so fun. Other classmates allwent to watch the movie. I felt pity they missed the class.

Such a happy and nice day..... I broughtdinner from watterson and a cup of cocktail. I slept so sweet.

16th

22th

Well, now I'm in the plane. How time flies.....let me tell u these days in detail.

16th, it was Thursday. Kelly and I had adeal I would bring Ranjie with me to go to her little sis's concert. In theafternoon about 3 hours before we met I msged yimin( the director of ISU)telling I would go Kelly's house that night. I never doubted she would say no.But she did. I felt so anxious and was inCoffee Hound with friends doing some homework. The I called our teacherWangjun begged him to say yes. He called yimin but she still said no. Anyway Iwas very disappointed and cried and emailed Kelly. I hated yimin so much. I wasso furious. But I had no other ways. I was depressed till 5:15 I was in IHouseand our teacher said I actually don't need tell yimin. He said I'm a adult andshould be responsible for myself, besides it's such a good chance to go see aconcert. So I just decided to go and meet Kelly. 5:30 was the planned time. Weemailed each other and said even I couldn't go concert we still could saygoodbye properly. So there at 5:30 I met Kelly..... she looked disappointedlike I did.... when she saw me she started to talk '

yan,I'm sorry about that .... I couldunderstand ......'

then I interrupted ' no you don't, Kelly.You don't understand.bcz my teacher said I could go with u tonight !'

She looked stone for a while and eyes big,then flooded happiness. ' really??? U can go now? Will this get u intotrouble?' '

I happily nodded my head and we hugged. Onthe way to her house she kept asking if this would cause me into trouble. Ikept telling her I wouldn't be.

That night was wonderful. Kelly's familiesare kind, gentle and nice. Her father is a farmer and her mother is the'government' in the house ( as her father joked). In the evening we all sattogether and saw their families photos. They don't have tv in the house which Ithink is not a bad thing. Kelly and her little sis all can play music well. Ican tell their instruments are quite expensive and theirs furnitures are goodqualities. In the morning she showed me their cows and farm. Then she drove meback school. Then the 17 was the reflection day. Kelly gave me a lollipop, abag of their popcorn and a "curtiss" which is a blue flower she madeherself.

18th

It was Saturday and we went to Springfieldto visit Lincoln's museum. How amazed I felt when I was in the library andmuseum there. I was impressed. There were theaters and wood house and gallery.We went to Lincoln's tomb too. Americans..... ah when can we have thiswonderful constructions!

那天完全是被震撼了,感慨国外这些设施真的是老少皆宜,很有意义,有对林肯全面的认识,不是一味只表扬,有些当时的人对他的批判的。

19th

Me and曦彤were picked up byour host families and went to a modern church called Eastview. They have a bandthere. When we sang together, ppl looked so sincere. And I wondered whywesterners and us. We don't have religion. Sometimes we can go things that farbelow the moral rule bcz we don't feel afraid. We are bold. But religion isvery common in other countries. I felt we are some kind of barbaric. I'm notsaying westerners are all good. But it's really different that live in areligious countries and unreligious one. Ppl do act different.

20-21st

These two days I went to Chicago. 20th wasjust on shopping and the next day I visited The Art Institute of Chicago andthe Willis Tower. I met The Nighthawks and was so surprised. So shocked. On thetrain back to normal a stranger uncle was sitting next to me. We talked whilethrough the time I'm train. He looked like The Iron Man and was so handsome....he gave me his business card when we got offthe train. God I like this uncle lol.

Ok rest a little now.

2017.2.26

回到中国第三天,每天白天都很困,腹泻,疲惫,倒时差很难受。

有时候做梦都还梦见自己仍在美国,后悔没有在奥特莱斯血拼,或者是礼物没有买够,得罪了室友,有时候梦见火车上的钢铁侠叔叔,或者是Peter,或者只是在ISU的教室里上课,如临其境。

在美国呆的时间不长,但每一天都很充实,每天都学习到新的东西。

很理解为什么这么多人想移民,那个国度,比我们富裕,文明程度比我们高,物质条件比我们优越,就是说生活的真的比我们好很多。给我印象最深的是林肯博物馆,与中国相比,别人的博物馆老少皆宜,生动有趣,而且介绍丰富,批判角度也有。美国人生活压力确实比我们大,但他们物质条件也比我们好;教育质量比我们高,家庭教育比我们更完善;言论更自由,天都比我们蓝。。。我对到美国读书的想法从想去,变为不想去,最后变回还是想去。

本来以为自己会写很多,没想到也只是寥寥数句。就这样吧

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