This article is a note for a TED talk given by Guy Winch, a psychologist from New York City. in the talk, Guy Winch answered an question, which he believes we should think about more but we did not, why we need to take care of our psychologically health as much as we do to our physical health, and how to practice emotional first aid.
It is so natural for all of us to brush our teeth twice a day, or reach out a bandage when we have our knees, however, we do not have the same habit to our mind. Guy Winch urges that it is time to close the gap between our physical and psychological health.
The first battle is with #Loneliness#. People living in the crowded cities are around various information everyday, which has made it uneasy to tell the pure subjective identification, loneliness. Much valid research suggests loneliness's severe impact on our life, no matter we realize its exist or not. Chronic loneliness could damage your immune system, making you vulnerable to disease.
It creates a deep psychological wound. When they distort our perceptions and scramble our thinking, it makes us believe that those around us care less than they actually do. It makes us fear of reaching out, because why set ourselves for rejections and heartache when your heat has been akin more than you could stand.
It is important to spot our loneliness as well as taking action when we feel it. Give a bandage to the wound because it really matters.
What could also cause psychological wound is #Failure#. Guy Winch tells one of his personal observation at the Care Center. Three toddlers had completely different reaction to the identical toy. One kid tried every method to figure the tricky toy out, the other two gave up in the middle or bursted out without touching it. Their reaction reflects our adults' attitudes to failure. Here is the reason why so many people function below their potential: their mind try to convince them that they are incapable of something by failure and they choose to believe it. Instead of escaping from the feeling of helplessness, we should fight against it, shake off the negative thoughts and regain the control over the situation.
Through observing how we react to failure or rejection, most of us would find that we are not always our own truly good friend. Sometime we are so supportive to ourselves, but maybe the next second we think we are the worst one in the world. Once our self-esteem is already hurting, we tend to destroy it furthermore rather than protect it. However, the first thing we should do in low self-esteem is to revive it, not "join a fight club and beat it". Because it takes longer to recover from the failure and rejection when we have low self-esteem, which has big chance to result in bigger failure and rejection. Start from now, treat yourself in the way you are expecting from your truly friend.
