【原创·文/译文】
精灵收起回忆，倾听金龟子弹奏的一曲月光小调。
他们成了朋友，共同在这个狭窄的花草的世界游行，借着一道短短的生命之光。
在离开玫瑰姑娘和金龟子的故乡的时候，金龟子把一片玫瑰花瓣叠了起来，藏在背包里，每个晚上都搂着它，似乎就枕着玫瑰姑娘的清香。而精灵早已不再执著，他爱姑娘们，每到一处地方，总有年轻美丽的姑娘同他相伴，夜晚共同度过黑暗和寂寞。
而这天晚上，四周都是寂静，再没有吵吵嚷嚷、活泼可爱的姑娘们了。
月光小调在金龟子鼻尖一滴硕大的泪水滚落的颤音中结束了。接着这个可怜渺小的生物鼓起勇气，露出一个大大的微笑。他抱起收藏着花瓣的背包，狠狠地吸了一口气。
精灵只是静静地坐在那里，享受少有的独处的清静。
这是一个很奇妙的林子，有些神秘，异常优雅。每一片草叶的卷儿似乎都经过了精心的设计，像女人的长发一样妩媚动人，又有天鹅的颈的舒展优美。
他已经记不清多久没能这么静静地欣赏四周的景物了，因为过去的很长一段时间，他都忙着同姑娘们打交道。他经历了形形色色的女人，玫瑰姑娘尽管是其中很美的一个，但她并不是“难忘”的，因为年轻漂亮的姑娘太多了，好像春天虽然美，但是对于一个已经成年的人来说，最初的一声鸟鸣不再能像童年时敲开他心肺一样，那么使人心潮澎湃。至于他的第一朵花，她像一条冗长曲折的走廊尽头遥远的影，他再也看不清，她独特的清香和色调也早已在他记忆中模糊。
金龟子不同，他只爱过玫瑰姑娘，所以哪怕他并没有真正得到过玫瑰姑娘的爱情，他对她的记忆，也比精灵对她，或对任何一个他经历过的女人，或者他那第一朵花要深刻而真实。
只是这天晚上，当四周都是寂静的时候，当金龟子眼角挂着一颗泪水，怀里紧紧抱着背包入眠的时候，精灵突然再次回忆起了寂寞的滋味——好像一坛醇酒，唤起他最初的记忆，呛得他流泪。
精灵收起翅膀，步行在这片异常优美的林子之中。
渐渐的他听到了许多女子的笑声，循着声音，他远远地看到了一座花的宫殿，而在穿过一片他叫不出名字、飘着许多浪漫的半透明帘子的植物之后，他看到一个被簇拥着的雍容华贵的女子……他不禁轻轻地惊叫出来：“玫瑰姑娘……”
众花都笑了。
那个戴着花冠、最为耀眼的女子也微微地笑了。
他才发现，她虽然长得同玫瑰姑娘很像，但她拥有一头蓝色的梦幻般的长发，而不是热情似火的红发。
她端详着他，正如帝王细看她的臣子。接着她微笑着对身旁的近侍说了些话，精灵被邀请同花的女王共度良宵。
那是一场奢华的酒宴。
精灵从他同其他花的交谈中了解到，玫瑰姑娘其实是女王的妹妹，这就是为什么她能如此长寿，还能拥有傲人的美丽。只是女王嫉妒同样王族出生的妹妹，怕她夺走本属于当姐姐的她的地位，加之玫瑰姑娘天生桀骜不驯，不愿接受宫廷中复杂糜烂的生活，玫瑰姑娘很早就离家出走。这虽然顺从了女王的心意，但女王依旧派人追踪玫瑰的消息，直到她听说妹妹消亡在那个让她销魂的精灵的手里。
“所以，女王您也想经历能让玫瑰销魂的爱情？”精灵淡淡地问道。
女王嫣然一笑，她身后柔亮的丝绸帘子闪烁着奢华的光泽，精美绝伦的宫廷装潢叫人如痴如醉。
精灵们生就俘虏女人心灵的魅力。然而女王像玫瑰姑娘一样接触过很多精灵，他不明白，为什么她会选中他——他只是其中很普通的一个。
的确第二天，当他醒来的时候，他发现宫殿、侍从、女王，都不在了。他明白她抛弃了他；他明白普普通通的自己不能满足女王的愿望，那大概是过于奢华的恋爱，他怎提供得起。所以她不辞而别，所有的她的一切也都通通被带走，回归它们该存在的地方去了。
然而当他回到金龟子身边时，金龟子战战兢兢地把一个包裹交给了他。
“是什么？”精灵淡淡地问道。
丝绸方帕打开，一顶花冠展现眼前。
“是……是女王……要我转交给你，”他尖声尖气地说，“她怕是对你动真情啦！”
精灵微微吃了一惊。
“她还说，”金龟子望着精灵的眼里充满了不必要的崇敬，“她恐怕得走了，要不然，你或许会害得整个花的王国失去她们的首领！”
精灵默默地举起花冠，一卷印花纸条落了出来，女王娟秀的字体写道：
“什么是你的期待？”
生命的最初的迷惘，恐惧、安慰、挣扎、力量的取得……回忆冲击着他的灵魂，他感到自己似乎被人揪住了翅膀，而那生命的纹理似乎在他眼前展开……他拼命地解读和记忆，那些跳动的密码，从无形到有形，无声到有声，从毫无意义到逐渐显露它们的呼告……
精灵突然飞了起来，他眼里的神采像他风中的头发一样凌乱，有些疯狂，甚至有些恐怖。
金龟子被吓坏了，他急忙拎起背包，笨拙地挥动起自己的翅膀……女王那顶价值连城的花冠乒乒乓乓地坠落在地，摔成了花哨的碎片。
精灵突然降落在一片秋日中的荒园里。他脚下的那抔土，陌生而熟悉……上面虽然全是枯枝残叶，但原先的形状依稀可见。
……他甚至看到自己最后的那两个脚印，被深深掩藏在枯败的野草梗里。
……甚至看到她美丽的笑容……尽管她失去了生命中最后的水分……
她是美丽的……她注定老去的命运是他躲不开的伤痛，而这命运却也永远抹煞不掉她曾经存在的痕迹，哪怕这痕迹是他胸中的痛，抑或是他记忆里永久的幸福……
精灵像孩子一样大哭起来。
金龟子不知所措，但他被这世间最委屈的哭声所感染，突然间，生命中被笑声掩藏的苦难似乎都浮现于水面，他看到新生的绿叶，更看到了那些平时被他忽略的老去的叶子……他听到昔日葬礼的沉寂敲得他耳膜轰轰作响，而周围又满是新生的笑声和最后的呼告，矛盾地交织在一起，熙熙攘攘……
金龟子摊坐在地上，不知为什么，胸中满是莫名的悲伤，哽得他喘不过气来。
等他再次抬起头来的时候，他发现精灵不知什么时候已经把两片翅膀折了下来，插在那抔小小的土堆上，而精灵本人已经消失在他的视野之中。
金龟子环顾四周，没能再瞅见他的背影，却看到满满一个待人打理的园子。
他在这里安顿下来，怀里还紧紧搂着收藏着玫瑰花瓣的背包。
冬天是多么的宁静。
第二年春天的时候，金龟子发现那抔土堆上长出了一株新的草，开的是金灿灿的花。
原来这是蒲公英花。
等花谢后，总有精灵的翅膀般洁白的绒球，每逢清风吹过，纯洁的思绪满空。
而他似乎在烂漫的蓝天中，目光穿过那些飞舞的洁白的绒毛，看到精灵默默地守着他深爱的花，耐心地陪她走完命运最后一刻的安排，无论结局是悲伤还是快乐。
【完】
The elf put away his memories, and listened to the beetle play a moon melody quietly.
They had become friends, travelling together in a narrow world of flowers and grasses in their briefly lighted lives.
The beetle collected one of the rose petals just before he left where Lady Rose and he had lived, and kept it in a pack bag, holding it during each night, as if he could hence rest his head in the scent of Lady Rose. But the elf had already given up. He loved girls, and he could always find company of pretty young girls wherever he went, killing off the lonely night with them.
However, it was a silent night without a single noisy, lively girl.
The moon melody ended in a vibrato with a huge drop of tear fell off from the beetle’s nose. Then the humble creature raised courage, rewarded himself a big smile. He held up the petal bag, inhaled a mouthful of flower scent.
The elf was just sitting quietly, enjoying the unusual stillness of being alone.
It was a marvellous forest, mysterious and graceful. Each curve of the grass leaf was elaborately designed, charming like women’s long hair, elegant as the long neck of a swan.
He couldn't remember how long it had been for him to enjoy sceneries quietly again, because he had always been busy with girls. He had experienced so many women. Although Lady Rose was a very beautiful one, she was not that unforgettable because there were so many other pretty young girls. Just like although spring was beautiful, for an adult however, the first sound of bird in the spring could not once again touch him and move him like what it had done long ago in his childhood. As for his first flower, she was a distant figure in the end of a curved long corridor and he could not see her clearly anymore. Her unique scent and colour had blurred in his memory.
But the beetle was different as he had only loved Lady Rose. So his memory about Lady Rose was much clearer and more vivid than the impression the elf would have for any of the girls he had experienced, including Lady Rose, though the beetle never won Lady Rose’s heart.
However, the elf suddenly felt lonely again tonight, when everything was in silence, when the beetle was sleeping tight on the petal bag with a drop of tear near his eyes. This loneliness was a mellow wine that retrieved his first memory, choke him to tears.
The elf closed up his wings, walking into the extremely elegant forest.
He could hear laughter of girls getting aloud, and soon he saw a palace of flowers from distance as he followed where the laughter came from. After passing a number of exotic plants hanging romantic translucent curtains, he saw a glorious lady being crowded and couldn’t help calling: “Lady Rose…”
Everybody laughed.
So did the crowned glorious lady.
Not until then did he find that although she looked alike to Lady Rose, she had magical blue hair instead of passionate red hair.
She looked down at him, just like an empress looked at her subject. Then she smiled and talked to the waiting lady nearby. The elf was invited to spend the night with the Queen of flower.
It was an extravagant dinner.
The elf learnt from the conversation with other flowers that Lady Rose was the younger sister of the Queen, which was why she had such a long life expectancy and impressive beauty. But the Queen was jealous of the royal sister and worried that she might usurp her throne. Lady Rose, however, was so untrammelled and she didn't like the complex and corrupt royal life, and she had left the palace when she was young. This satisfied the Queen’s wish, but she still sent people to know what was going on with Rose, until she learnt that her younger sister died in the hand of the charming elf.
“So, your majesty also want to taste the charming love which had attracted Rose?” the elf asked in calm.
The Queen rewarded him a beautiful smile. The silk curtain behind her flashed extravagantly; the decoration of the palace was so intoxicating.
Elves were born to attract women. But the Queen had met a number of elves just as Lady Rose. So he was so confused why the Queen chose him – he was merely an ordinary.
And he was right. The next morning when he woke up, the palace, the servants as well as the Queen had all disappeared. He knew she abandoned him; he knew such an ordinary as him could not satisfy the wishes of her majesty, which was perhaps too expensive a love for him to afford. Maybe that’s why she left for somewhere they would truly belong to, with all her belongings, and didn’t even say goodbye.
But as he came back, he was given a package by the shivering beetle.
“What’s that?” he asked, unconcerned.
A crown of flower appeared as he unfolded the silk handkerchief.
“The Queen…the Queen told me to hand it to you,” the beetle cried, “perhaps she’s in love with you!”
The elf was a bit surprised.
“And she added,” the beetle stared at the elf with unnecessary admiration, “she had to go now; otherwise you could make the entire kingdom of flowers lose their Queen!”
The elf lifted the crown quietly, and a roll of sealed paper fell out. With neat handwriting of the Queen it said: “What is your expectation?”
The initial confusion of life, fears, comfort, struggle, the gain of power and energy…all the memories were pounding his soul, he felt as if someone captured his wings ruthlessly, and at meantime the codes of lives hidden in the lines and grains of wings were unfolded in front of him…He was striving to decrypt and memorise them: the scrambling codes gradually came into order, becoming acoustic, from meaningless to appealing aloud…
Suddenly the elf flew off. The looks in his eyes were as scattered as his messy hair, crazy and even scary.
The beetle was frightened. He grabbed his bag and started flapping awkwardly…the Queen’s flashy crown fell to the ground into gaudy pieces.
The elf landed in an abandoned garden in the sunshine of autumn. The mound looked strange but familiar… Although it was now covered by withered leaves, the original shape was still faintly visible.
…He could even see his last two feet prints, deeply hidden in the dry weeds.
…Even her beautiful smile appeared…her inevitable fate of withering was his unavoidable sorrow. But this miserable destiny could never rub away the evidence of her existence, even if it was the pain in his heart – or instead, the permanent happiness inside his memory…
The elf cried like a little child.
The beetle didn't know what to do, but he was moved by the most wronged cries. All in a sudden, sorrows of life that were hidden by laughter all drifted to the surface. He saw the fresh new leaves, but also the aging and dying ones which used to be neglected…He heard the silence of the funeral, so silent that his ear drum ached, but also the young laughter as well as the last cries of creatures, which mixed up contradictorily, boisterously…
The beetle sat on the ground, exhausted, with strange sorrows fulfilled his heart which choked him so hard.
And when he finally raised his head, he found that somehow the elf had torn down his wings and stuck them into the lump of soil. And the elf had disappeared in his sight.
Instead of seeing the elf again when he looked around, the beetle saw an entire garden that needed caring.
So he settled down here; the petal bag safely in his arms.
How peaceful the winter was.
And when the next spring came, the beetle noticed a new grass growing from the mound, opening golden and shiny flowers.
This was a dandelion.
After the withering of the flowers, there were pompons as white as the wings of an angel.
Each time the breeze came, the innocent thoughts carried by fluffs spread all around.
And when he looked through the floating pure fluffs into the brilliant blue sky, he felt as if he saw the elf again: he was quietly taking care of his favourite flower, patiently accompanying her till the end of her life, no matter happy or sorrow the ending was to be.
[Fin]
【原创于2009年秋，英格兰，约克；自译于2011年，约克】
【愿借此以文会友·欧美文学粉】
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