我感到我陷入了一个怪圈。
去影院不能随心所欲地选择，要按着豆瓣的评分逐一排序，由着影评中的只字片语去发现那些值得我付出毛爷爷的片子。书籍亦如此，反而是因听音乐的时间成本相对较低，在音乐上我对评价的依赖部队。如今这些曾一度困扰我的问题扩大范围。《断舍离》、《如何阅读一本书》诸如此类，我不厌其烦地去寻找着guidebook，仿佛只要找对了那把钥匙，我就可以如所愿地无所不能了。
问题是，想要获得什么的重点是在于努力的过程，而我正在把过程这根长线急遽缩短，通过他人的经验来指导我。花费大量时间摸清概览的充实感足够麻痹自己，「感觉自己已经对整件事情了如指掌了呢。」但当我投入越来越多的时间游离在advance层面，耐心耗尽，哪来的时间把这腔热情转向current层面呢？所以什么过后的思考，也是不需要了。
把大把的时间花在how to do上，我固然可以安慰自己「要打，就要打有准备的仗」，实际上一直在踌躇。到底是我「不能」还是「不想」？
下一步要做的，就是抛开how to do。少上知乎多看书。
（以上为语文课的无聊涂鸦）
【补】
欧洲思想的考试总算结束了，感觉还不错。前面一边打一边觉得复习了很久的On Liberty(J.S.Mill)已然道出了真理。摘录几段：
but ,in the first place, their experience may be too narrow; or they may not have interpreted it rightly. Secondly, their interpretation of experience may be correct but unsuitable to him. Customs are made for customary circumstances, and customary characters: and his circumstances or his character may be uncustomary. Thirdly, though the customs be both good as customs, and suitable to him, yet to conform to custom, merely as custom, does not educate or develop in him any of the qualities which are the distinctive endowment of a human being.
The human faculties of perception, judgement discriminative feeling, mental activity, and even moral preference, are exercised only in making a choice.
